I've come to a fork in the road

If you recall, yesterday I lamented the difficulty of knowing when to walk away from a relationship and when to stick it out.  Today, I'm even more confused.

Yesterday was a bad day.  I found out that the job I interviewed for and felt 99% sure I had gotten may no longer be hiring anyone.  That made me upset.  Then I found out that all of my friends decided to bail on Thanksgiving dinner, leaving me alone for the holiday.  That ruined my day.  And then I released all of my pent-up frustration with the job situation and the living situation with my sister and the friends situation and had a minor meltdown.  I needed someone to talk to and I instinctively turned to him, because he's been there for me in these kinds of situations for the last two years.

I intentionally did not bring up our relationship.  That wasn't the issue last night, so no point in dragging it into everything else going on.  But he brought it up.  He once again apologized for everything he did.  He said he realizes how terrible he was to me.  And then right before he left, he told me that he thinks of me and misses me all the time. 

One month ago, he told me he wanted me to just go away and leave him alone.  He wanted me out of his life.  Now he's giving me all sorts of signals that he wants me in his life.  I thought I wanted him out of my life because of the person he had become.  But now I keep seeing glimpses of the person I fell in love with and that's the person I still want to be with.

My family and friends would kill me if they even knew that I was considering anything happening with him.  How does anyone ever know if they're making the right decision?  There are too many what-ifs in these situations.  What if I walk away but he really is ready to be the man I need him to be?  What if I work things out with him and waste two more years for things to eventually end anyway?